The Best Dinner Party Story Ever
At the present moment, Miss Mussel should be busy working on a subprime mortgage book. Instead, she is taking time out to bring you this 100% true story in case you, dear reader, have a social occasion at which you need to pull out the big guns.
Ok, so….a friend of a friend (only two degrees, promise)…anyway, this couple had adopted a child with autism. They hadn’t had him for that long when they decided to take him to the zoo for the day. This family lives in Windsor, so the closest zoo was across the border in Detroit.
They get to the zoo and are looking at the animals but the couple soon realizes that the boy is nowhere to be found. The zoo is shut down for two hours while they look for the child. (He’s about six or seven). Finally, after two hours, they find the boy wandering around covered in mud screaming at the top of his lungs. Being alone in for that long in a public place would be too much for any child but his autism exacerbates the situation and his parents decide to take him home.
They have a little trouble at the border explaining why their child won’t stop screaming but finally they get home. As soon as they enter the house, the boy runs into the bathroom and locks the door. After a while, it becomes apparent that he is not coming out, so the parents get some tools and jimmy the door. When they open it, they find their son sitting in the bathtub with a baby penguin.
That’s right. A BABY PENGUIN.
The boy must have somehow concealed it in his puffy winter coat with his own screaming drowning out any sqwaking the penguin was doing. The family called the Detroit Zoo to tell them about their souvenir but switchboard thought it was a prank and hung up on them. After the third hang-up, they finally called Border Patrol managed to get the little guy back with his pals at the zoo.
Because the boy is autistic, he is not able to tell anyone how he managed to snag the penguin in the first place. Bloody brilliant or what?
