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Trude Herr: Genius Beyond Measure

August 17th, 2010
The OM’s foreign correspondent sends these slices of brilliance from Cologne. Trude Herr (auf Deutsch) was a hometown girl, who had a great career as a character actress in German film and as a singer on the Berlin cabaret circuit. Here is Ms Trude in the precursor to Right Said Fred and I’m Too Sexy [a passable Google translation of the lyrics] When I was a baby, sweet and very stupid | As early as each man turned to me And if I was so fond of the polar-bear | Met with delight each of the shock And why? Because I’m so sexy, sexy and mad | Are all the men out, all the men out | When they see me, from eighty to ten Because I’m so sexy, sexy and mad | I tear men down, I tear it back and forth | Until they just let ??? I don’t have a Sophia Loren chassis | But otherwise I’m cute, you probably can see In Petticoat and fishnet stocking I whistle too | One can see that I do not need something like And why? [chorus] I go so much fishing, pike, or whether ?? | However, all fish that swim past But see me once while fishing any man | ??pike that bites at me And why? [chorus] [chorus 2] Trude’s crowning moment is this performance of Ich will keine Schokolade in 1965. At first Miss Mussel feared a Liza With A Z situation but after a few bars, it’s obvious she has the audience eating out of her hand instead of wondering what rehab centres are nearby. Trude is bringing it in a tent-shaped tunic and Miss Mussel cannot do anything other than be deeply impressed. [again with the Google translation. Basically our damsel wants to get busy and when her mission is compromised by offers of chocolate, she throws tantrums] I’m incredibly solid and I have never dated. I’m more than with parents, a bit of a walk now and then. My father says it must remain that and for that he gives me candy. But the other day was the last straw because I do not taste sweets anymore! I do not want chocolate, I prefer a man who I want to kiss me and can wrap around my finger! I recently had grad birthday and forget this day I never because all the aunts and relatives were with the party. They brought roses and daffodils and heavy as chocolate, there’s me suddenly swept away, I screamed, “I want that stuff no more.” [chorus] I bought Sunday at the fair for twenty penny to me a lot. I’ve actually won but the disappointment was great. But because I won a teddy bear, chocolate ‘and marzipan. I threw the rage in the crowd and yelled at the ticket sellers: [chorus]


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